The Open Window

In the class I just finished teaching, there is a lesson about a phenomenon in parenting called "the open window". It's when your child lets you have a glimpse of their heart, who they really are, risking rejection or disappointment. One of the things we teach is that a great time to catch the window open is when you are driving. Since they aren't having to look you directly in the eye and you aren't even sitting face to face, this is an opportune time to ask your child questions that involve more of an answer than yes or no. Even boys will sometimes spill their hearts about a problem at school or a crush on a girl going down the interstate at 70mph.
The other really good time to catch an open window is at bedtime. If we will only embrace these quiet moments instead of rushing through them, we will likely get invited into the most intimate of conversations in a dark room at our child's bedside.
That, of course, is not the window I am writing about today. :)
After some t.v. time with Elena this morning, she told me it was time to go "night night" (a good 45 minuted before her normal nap). She turned off the t.v. and turned on the noise machine before crawling into the covers of my bed and asking me to snuggle. Now, I had to eat this up because Elena is not one to really be snuggly. Don't get me wrong- she loves her hugs and wants to be in my lap, but laying down and being still is not her thing. As I laid next to her wondering if she was actually going to go to sleep in my bed (which has pretty much only ever happened when she has been really sick and she has just passed out there), she asked me to rub her back. Thinking that was just really sweet, I started to rub. Back and forth, back and forth, with an occasional pat-pat-pat in there for good measure. As she closed her eyes and began to lick her arm the way she does when she goes to sleep, she whispered, "No, Mommy, open my window." And I realized she wanted me to pull up her shirt and rub on her skin. Not quite the bedtime window we teach about, but definitely one of the sweetest, most tender moments of mommyhood. :)